Facts About Fairytale Spiders

Alternate title (because I like alliterations): Some Spiders Smile 

People are taught to believe that all spiders have eight legs, eight eyes and no smile. While this is largely a fact for regular spiders – here’s a small list of facts that I know to be true only for fairytale spiders.

Just as regular, everyday people are different from fairytale people, so are regular, everyday spiders different from fairytale spiders. Fairytale spiders sometimes have six legs, and many times seven.

Fairytale spiders never climb walls - because they wouldn’t be able to do an eight-legged handshake with the regular spiders, and this would make them seem rude; and they really are very nice.

Fairytale spiders only ever build their houses in and around lavender pots or rosemary shrubs. The thin, spindly leaves and the deeply aromatic fragrance from both plants help fairytale spiders not care about the fact that they are a limb or two short of being regular. Who would care to be regular if they could live in lavender all day?!

Guess what colours fairytale spiders love? Every shade of violet (from a pretty and pale lilac to a rich and royal purple) and green (light and lovely jade to a deep and delicious emerald), of course!

Fairytale spiders can be shy since they have only ever known lavenders, rosemaries and other fairytale spiders. So, if you ever come across a fairytale spider, remember to be brave and start a conversation. They love talking to little children, and will never scurry away, pretending to have other more important things to do, like regular spiders.

They love a good story and they’d gladly accept a drop or two of grape juice (anything purple and sweet, really).

There is one thing to remember, though. Fairytale spiders can never keep a secret. Since they were born in fairytales, they’ve always had their tales and adventures shared. This makes them believe that no one wants to keep anything private.

Fairytale spiders love symmetry - especially the seven-legged ones.

However, they are wise enough to know that while the grass looks greener on the other side, it will never smell as wonderful as home. This is also why fairytale spiders always have wide smiles across their furry faces.

~

Fairytale spiders never climb the wall,

And so, are rarely scared of having a fall - great or small.

Fairytale spiders love to hear you tell tales,

Of anything, from castles and dragons to ships and sails.

So pick up a book, and read aloud to your fairytale spider friend,

But remember that if ask them to keep a secret, you will drive them ‘round the bend. 

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Roundly panned by three literary type critics (two of whom I completely trust) with the same feedback: The story requires character development or it needs to be a collection of stories to make it worthy of consideration for an established publisher. So, if you're a pre-aspiring children's writer bird, take these wings and fly.